


The Person You Could Have Been

by Clocksmith



Category: Crash Bandicoot (Video Games)
Genre: Arguing, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Enemies to Friends, F/F, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Maybe Enemies to Friends to Lovers, bad day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-29
Updated: 2020-07-29
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:08:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25591801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Clocksmith/pseuds/Clocksmith
Summary: Taking out her pent-up frustration on Nina Cortex, Coco uncovers some revelations that Nina would have rather stayed buried.
Relationships: Coco Bandicoot/Nina Cortex
Comments: 2
Kudos: 28





	1. Well and Truly Fudged

**Author's Note:**

> Another commission piece from jacobgross555 on fiverr! If you're interested in a commission of your own, ou can find me here: www.fiverr.com/eerieclocksmith/write-the-thing-if-you-want-the-thing

Laptop battery; fried.

Phone; dissolving in the gullet of a carnivorous plant.

Leg; burned by a vaguely apologetic but completely inept COR-NEO SYSTEMS employee.

Day; fudged.

Well and truly fudged.

Fudged didn’t even feel like a good enough word anymore. It wasn’t that Coco _didn’t_ swear: Crash and Crunch could both attest to the fact that she very much did. Most days though, dealing with the problems she dealt with, there never seemed to be an occasion that quite called for it. The words came less naturally to her.

Some of those words felt very natural right now.

She’d just wanted to play some videogames. Spend some time doing absolutely nothing important because those were the things that she enjoyed doing. But no. Today was the day that her laptop finally gave up on her. And no spare batteries for Crash to fetch either. Not that it did her much good the last time she asked him to fetch one, but the option was at least there.

She’d only wanted to play some games because her phone had landed just a few inches too close to a plant that had decided that, yes, this particular phone did look rather tasty. A phone made from plastic and tempered glass. A phone that held _very_ little in the way of nutritional val– it wouldn’t have tasted good! It wouldn’t even have smelled good! It was a phone!

It was _Coco’s phone._

And she’d only dropped her phone because some stupid _asshole_ COR-NEO employee was so ridiculously inept at life that he thought it had been a good idea to _not_ look where he was aiming an industrial grade flamethrower whilst trying to exterminate a family of very dangerous, _stationary_ mutant plants. Yeah. Great idea, dude.

Amazing idea.

So amazing in fact, that Coco couldn’t think about anything else whilst trying to avoid the rest of the plants on her way to the nearby river. Or the wild animals. Or the rapids of the river that she was gently attempting to cool her leg in. Or the giant crabs. Or everything else that she had to deal with on a daily basis because of course she couldn’t live in a _normal_ jungle. No, she lived in the _Wumpa_ jungles. With sapient skunks and killer plants and evil scientists and no bakeries and no–

It was crap. Utter _hogcrap._

Coco had bad days. She’d spent years of her life fighting against mutated monsters and deranged scientists, so it was only natural. It was hard to _not_ have bad days when you lived somewhere that treated those occurrences as commonplace.

Sometimes you woke up to your island being attacked by giant robots. Other days, you got kidnapped by a deranged alien to take part in a racing tournament that decided whether the Earth got destroyed or not. Even Cortex and his rogues’ gallery had found that one to be a complete pain in the backside. And then there was the time that she had transformed into a mutated abomination by Cortex. That time another alien declared that the Earth would be paved over if he couldn’t be defeated in a race.

Lots of aliens and monsters that liked racing, really…

But today was different. Today was _mundane._ Today was the day her laptop died. Today was the day she had lost her phone and the day that a moron had seared away the leg of her favourite overalls and burned away all the fur hidden beneath. It was all so small in comparison to everything else that went wrong in her life. They were things she would happily deal with on the best of days, if it meant not being kidnapped by aliens.

Days like today were meant to be peaceful. And she still couldn’t catch a break.

Away from the river, her leg drying underneath the fabric of her ruined overalls, Coco was itching. Her leg stung from the sheer heat that had been applied to it, but that wasn’t what itched. Her muscles were tense and ready for _something_. She wanted to move, to run, to exert some force of energy onto something else.

She wanted to hit something. She wanted dozens of crates piled high in front of her, and she wanted her knuckles to hurt by the time she was done punching them into smithereens so that she could use the splintered planks to build and even _bigger_ piles of crates and _smash it with a hammer!_

But Coco didn’t have any crates, or boxes. Or hammers, for that matter. The river ran directly to her right and, to her left, there was only a vast gathering of greenery and thick, jungle trees.

Coco decided it was in her best interest to beat up a tree instead. “Huagh!”

As brilliant an idea as it had seemed to punch a pile of crates into broken oblivion, doing the same to a solid tree would likely only add another set of problems to Coco’s already terrible day filled with equally terrible things.

What began as a single, frustrated kick against the trunk evolved into a spinning tirade against the poor tree. Maybe it was having just as bad a day as Coco was. Maybe she should have been more considerate to the wellbeing of the tree, rather than beating the sap out of it.

But oh, it felt so _good_ to hit something.

The bark creaked under the pressure of Coco’s kick, leaves above shaking wildly like a storm brought about by the movement of her body alone. With each hit, and each slight pain that reverberated up her leg, the pressure inside her head lessened.

“If you’re going to kick a tree on my land,” a nasally voice suddenly called, “then make yourself useful and tear the whole thing down, would you? I like to keep on schedule.”

Then it all came rushing back with the fervour of a different kind of storm.

No.

Oh, Coco did not need this. Not from Nina Cortex. Coco’s finally kick came much harder than the rest, sending a shot of pain up her bones that she felt all the way to her hip. It didn’t make her feel any better.

As intent as she was to simply ignore the human, it was then that the words spoken completely registered. “What do you mean ‘your land’?”

Nina stared at Coco as if she’d been asked the most simply question in the world. “I mean it’s ‘my land’. I own this island.”

“You don’t own this island,” Coco seethed, the tree – likely thankful for the mercy Coco had shown – entirely forgotten. “No one _owns_ these islands.”

“My uncle does. Hence the name ‘Cortex Island’.”

One island, if it could still be called that. “You can stretch the meaning of the word all you want. No one owns these islands.”

“I think you’ll find my uncle owns all of these islands. Well, most of them.” Nina smiled an arrogant smile. “This island’s mine now.”

“Says who, exactly? Cortex and his stupid league of demented scientists?”

“More or less.” Nina waved a hand apathetically towards the south, towards the island Coco and her brothers called home. “You and Papu can keep your backwater little jungle.” Then the hands went behind her back. “Technically, I’m only in charge of a third of this island, but I’m sure a few well-aimed assaults from my new laboratory will convince him that it’s in his best interest to give me full control.”

The Wumpa Archipelago was a big place, even before you considered the sheer number of smaller islands that littered the outskirts of the larger ones.

Of course, there was the broken wreckage of the place that had once been Cortex island, with its sad excuse for a castle and the long since abandoned industrial complexes. Whole miles of the place littered with forgotten weapons and traps. The ice caps that housed his new laboratory wasn’t much better, even if it was better maintained.

But the natural islands? The jungles and the glades, the mountains draped with sparkling waterfalls. They belonged to no one. People _lived_ on the islands. Papu Papu had his village and there were farms and homes collected among the trees and wide-open spaces. But there was no single individual that had ownership over everything. Even Neo Cortex couldn’t claim that.

Or so Coco had thought.

“Since when did Cortex own any of this?”

“You’re kidding, right?” Nina replied, distinctly unimpressed. “Since he set up shop and created half the inhabitants. In case you’d forgotten, he _created_ you, Bandicoot. He was here before any of you were even knew what ‘here’ was.”

“Papu was here well before Cortex was.”

“And he gets to keep his little island. We’ve been very accommodating.”

Accommodating, Coco’s ass. “Yes, because mutating half of the animals on his island really feels like a kindness, doesn’t it?”

“We don’t _do_ kind. When you take that into consideration, we’re practically going out of our way to accommodate him.”

“I’m very well aware that you don’t _do_ kind.” And Coco was not in the mood to deal with that. Not now. “Why can’t you and your failure of an uncle just leave us alone, huh? We’ve been putting up with your shit for years and you don’t seem to get the message that you aren’t getting rid of us.”

Whether it was the initial backlash, or the rare use of ‘shit’, Coco didn’t know. But Nina’s eyes widened for the briefest second, before something sickly crawled its way onto her lips.

“Getting on your nerves, are we?”

“Don’t push me.”

“Or what?” Nina’s mechanical hands fell to ger sides, components within clicking and tightening with her grip. “You going to fight me, Bandicoot?”

Coco’s eyes narrowed.

*******

Nina was confident. Not above all else; her wicked intelligence trumped all else, and she was proud of it. But give her a chance to tick someone off, to get right under their skin and she would gladly take it. Especially for someone as pain-in-the-ass inducing as Coco Bandicoot.

Graduated, free from the depths of Evil Pubic School, Nina was ready to branch out. Spread her mechanical arms wide and squeeze the world dry for all it was worth. She had the know-how. She had more than enough experience. All she needed was somewhere she could ruminate in private. The spare rooms of her uncle’s laboratory no longer felt sufficient for someone with a degree in Evil and several significant scientific accomplishments under her belt.

It didn’t take much convincing to get an island from her uncle. Or part of an island that she would eventually usurp from under him. He got his spare rooms back and Nina got out the hell out of there.

She was her own woman, now. And this woman was going to absolutely _own_ the Wumpa Archipelago.

Assuming Crash, Coco or Crunch didn’t stick their wet, dirty noses in on any of her business. And as Coco stood there, only her eyes giving any hint that something was ever going to go down, Nina scoffed.

“Yeah,” Nina stated, confidently staring Coco down. “I thought not.” Classic good guy: they only got their hands dirty when it came right down to the wire.

Yet Coco’s mind continued to broil under the surface of frazzled hair and makeup, a twitch scratching at the corning of her eye.

Nina absently turned back to her work, heading towards the observation site for her new base. Foundations were almost complete. Spare for a single hapless goon who refused to finish burning the plants and a mutant bandicoot taking her hissy-fit out on the nearby trees, Nina was right on target for–

Something kicked her in the back, hard.

Nina went tumbling to the ground, face first into the dirt before rolling over herself in a somersault that only helped to cover her in more dirt and filthy jungle grass.

Looking up and around at her assailant, she found a somewhat surprised Coco.

“Did you just kick me?” Nina asked, full-well knowing the answer.

The brief shock on Coco’s face melted away, growing molten until it hardened into something more jagged. The bandicoot clenched her first, the sharpened points of her teeth showing for the first time in Nina didn’t know how long.

“Yeah,” the bandicoot eventually answered. Her tone was arid, free from her usual bubbliness. “Yeah, I did.”

Today hadn’t been planned. Today didn’t revolve around some devious scheme to take over the world or destroy the bandicoot’s Podunk little island. This was the start of Nina’s new life and she refused to spend it squabbling with a jumped-up little rat with too much time on her hands.

Then Coco pushed the final button. “What are _you_ going to do about it?” Coco snarled. “Bitch.”

Today was not an _evil_ day, but if Coco Bandicoot wanted one, she would get it.

“Says the talking rat.”

“You would know, wouldn’t you?” Coco immediately replied, snapping her teeth together, and making sure Nina saw.

“Wow, insulting my teeth, nice one. Didn’t know you were smart enough to go for a low-blow like that.” Which was… unusual, at any rate. Nina liked low. It was in her top five places to hit.

Coco Bandicoot wasn’t known for _low._ Coco Bandicoot didn’t go low, not unless you were referring to the brow of her comedy.

“Maybe this talking _marsupial_ is just tired of dealing with your crap all the time.”

“You live in the jungle like wild animals. I thought you’d be used to the smell of shit by now.”

“The only of pieces of shit on these islands are you and your stupid uncle.”

Nina rolled her shoulders, burning emotions whispering at the back of her brain. They wanted action. They wanted this problem dealt with. And for all the goons Nina had at her construction site, she _really_ wanted to deal with this problem herself, for once. Give it the personal touch…

Right in Coco’s stupid bandicoot face.

“Says the mutant that likes to play scientist on her _little pink laptop_ ,” Nina hissed, her voice purposefully childlike and high. “Even my uncle’s smarter than you’ll ever be.”

Nina swung a punch right for Coco, her arm extending hard and fast. It missed the rotten bandicoot by mere centimetres.

But her second fist hit her right in the stomach.

Coco bounced back, hitting the floor like a raggedy doll before skidding to an unforgiving stop. Her overalls were grazed by brown muck, a visible graze of blood on under an open patch of denim that was already red raw.

Oh, that felt good.

“You mean the clown who can’t even take down my brother.”

“My uncle _created_ your brother, moron.”

“He created you too, _moron.”_

What? How did she–?

Nina came to her senses just a second too late to see Coco slide across the ground and Kick Nina’s feet from under her. The girl found her face once again in the dirt

“Like hell he created me,” Nina spat, pushing herself up. “You know he’s not actually my dad, right?”

“Oh, please. _Everyone_ knows he’s your dad. Crash knows he’s your dad. _Penta_ know he’s your fucking dad!”

True.

Not that Nina cared all that much. She was his daughter by blood, nothing more. They worked much better as uncle and niece.

It meant less effort on her part.

“So what if he is?”

“He’s pretty shitty dad then, isn’t he?”

That didn’t hurt, not in a way that Nina could identify. But it got to her. It pulled at something deep in the back of her head and she absolutely hated Coco for that.

“My dad? Where even _is_ your dad? Scrounging on the jungle floor, humping a rock?”

“We don’t need parents.”

“I’ll take that as a yes, then!”

Forgoing another punch entirely, Nina stretched out her arms wide, wrapping the metal gauntlets that were her hands tight around Coco’s torso, trapping her arms to her sides. Only then did Nina stand to her full height, keeping the bandicoot her prisoner all the while.

It didn’t stop the mutant from talking. “I’d rather have no parents than one that treats me like crap.”

“Yeah, giving me the land for my own lab is a really shitty thing for a dad to do.”

“Don’t even try and pretend that I’m not telling the truth. Didn’t he ship you off to boarding school for basically your entire childhood?”

“I spent my childhood at one of the best evil schools in the world.”

“Until he dumped your ass in public school because you were too much of a pain in his.”

Evil Public School was the bane of Nina’s existence. Even after leaving, it didn’t leave. The knowledge that it was even a small part of her history grated at her senses like old bricks on a chalkboard.

Coco continued before Nina could a word in edgeways. “No, it’s worse than that, isn’t it? You got better than him for a few days and _then_ he shipped you off to public school.”

“I am better than him He’s just scared I’m going to overtake him.”

“Then why isn’t he trying to nurture that?”

“Evil. We’re _evil._ We don’t do nurturing.”

“Yeah, that’s obvious.” Coco went quiet for a second, apparently considering her next words. “Did you even _want_ to be evil? Ripper said you used to wear pink dresses and hold tea parties with plushies.”

Oh, the bandicoot was _not_ going there. That jumped up little blue kangaroo was going to get his ass kicked.

“Shut up.”

“Oh my god, he was right!”

Nina brought Coco in close, just so she could look her right in her eyes. “Shut up, you little insect.”

Coco promptly slammed her head into the big n on Nina’s forehead. Her grip loosed for just long enough for Coco to slipped herself free, kicking Nina in the chest while she did. As amazing Nina’s her hands were, they were not immune to reflex. _Sadly._

“Make me!” Coco said. “Or is the pretty little princess too scared of the big fluffy monster?”

_“Shut up!”_

“What happened to you then? Did your goth phase hit you that hard?”

“I. Am. Not. _Goth!”_ Her chest hurt; the breath had been knocked clean out of her. Still, Nina found a growl clawing its way out of her throat. “I have never been goth. Get that into your thick skull, Bandicoot.”

“You’re totally avoiding the question. I bet your uncle brainwashed you, didn’t he? That’s totally something he would do to his own daughter. Did he make you wear black and throw out all your pretty stuffed animals?”

“He cut my hands off.”

Coco just… stopped. Her anger faltered and a new emotion slapped itself hard across her face. It was mangled, mixed with something else. But Nina recognised it all too well from her early childhood.

Pity.

“He _cut your hands off?_ ”

“It’s hard to be evil when you spend your whole day playing with rabbits and hosting tea parties. He did me a favour.”

“ _A Favour?!”_ Coco balked. “You’re not serious. You literally cannot be serious.”

“Do you _see_ a pair of hands at the ends of these wrists? Because I do, and they’re fucking awesome.”

The fighting stalled, if just for a moment. Coco stood in silence, at this apparent _shocker_. If something of Nina’s had this much of an effect on her arch-nemesis, then she wanted to soak as much of it in as she could.

“He cut off your fucking hands, Nina!”

“And look where I am now,” Nina sang back, arms spread wide. He hands shot out and reached even further still. “I’m one of the greatest scientific minds in the world. In a few years I’m going to _own_ this planet. He did me a favour.”

Coco balked, the bared teeth in her mouth implying rage but her eyes filled with disgusting _pity_. “Are you _insane_? Do you even hear the words coming out of your mouth?”

“I’m just hearing a lot of white noise coming out of yours.”

“No. No, we’re doing this. I’m done, absolutely done putting up with all your shit.” Despite that, Coco’s eyes softened. Never losing that intensity but becoming less focused. “Why are you even here, Nina? What can Cortex possibly offer you?”

“Why do you even give a shit?”

Coco… wasn’t sure. But her answer was immediate. “Because if my dad cut off my hands, I’d want someone to give a shit about me as well!”

“I don’t need anyone giving a shit about me.”

“If you seriously think it’s okay for your dad to cut off your hands because you’re petting rabbits then, yeah. I think you do need someone. Anyone.”

“What, and that’s you, is it?”

Evidently, Coco didn’t know. If Coco was being honest, she really didn’t. Her sharp teeth ground together and the muscles in her usually soft face grew hard and tense. The air practically vibrated around her and whatever frustrations were building up inside were all but controlling every action she tried to take.

Not that Nina felt much different.

“Is this why you’re such an ass to us?” Coco eventually asked. “Because your dad treated you like hogcrap?”

“I’m not sure you heard. Best school in the world. Cohabitation of a first-class laboratory.”

“That’s normal dad stuff, you idiot! Putting you through school? _Living with him?_ You think they’re special things that only special dads do?” She blinked. “Has he ever told you he loves you?”

“Now you’re just being prissy.”

“Why? He’s your _dad_.”

Uncle.

_Uncle._

“We don’t have that sort of relationship, not that it’s any of your business.”

“Then why stay?! He cut off your hands. I can’t believe I even have to emphasise this shit to someone like you. You’re a genius! You’re probably smarter than I’ll ever be!” Not hard. “He. Cut. Off. Your. Fucking. Hands! Because you liked petting rabbits?”

“Like you wouldn’t punish your kids for doing things you didn’t approve of.”

“I wouldn’t cut their hands off! No one should cut their kids’ hands off. _Period._ Fucking, ever.”

Nina scowled. Coco didn’t know what she was talking about.

Coco was too busy in her bright little world, surrounded by the jungle and furry creatures. Sitting with friends and drinking tea and probably another million things that made Nina positively gag. The ‘good guys’ didn’t have it the same way she had it. Nina liked her world.

Now Coco was trying to force her own world view down Nina’s throat.

“What does removing your hands even achieve? Makes sure you can’t pet animals?”

“Exactly that,” Nina replied. Something… occurred. Somewhere, deep in the back of her head. She ignored it. “It’s hard to play with rabbits when your liable to crush them.”

Evidently, that wasn’t the logical conclusion that Coco had been searching for. The bandicoot rubbed her palms hard into her eyes. “Why do you like this man. Tell me, because I don’t understand. Why do you stick with Cortex?”

“Why not?”

“Because – because, ugh! Okay, fine. What about you?”

“What about _me_?”

“Say he hadn’t cut your hands off, then carted you off to an evil boarding school. Or say he had sent you with your hands not separated from your fucking body. Would you still have become evil?”

Of… course Nina would have. Obviously. She began to scoff, but Coco cut her off.

“So, if he hadn’t done anything, if he’d left you to do whatever you wanted with your dresses and your animals, you’re telling me you would have become the exact same person standing in front of me right now.”

“Duh, of course I wouldn’t be exactly the same. That’s how little changes work, dumbass.”

“Answer the question.”

“No.”

“Answer my question!”

“So you can get all high and mighty and moral on me? Fat chance.”

“Because you _know_ the answer. You know that you wouldn’t be who you are if it wasn’t for him.”

“And why should that matter?”

“Because you’re not the person you could have been!”

Nina… didn’t know how to reply to that. Words wriggled at the back of her head, sliding over her other thought process like a mass of tangled worms. Small on their own but gathering weight. Coming together into something foul and slimy.

“I’m exactly who I want to be.”

“Would Nina think that? The Nina who still had hands and liked to have tea parties. The one who was _too nice_ to be a Cortex?”

“I grew up.”

“You’re certain of that, are you? That if you went back in time and asked her, she’d be fine with it. So fine, you can’t answer my one simple question.”

“I don’t need to answer any of your questions! This is my land; this is my island. If you can’t deal with that, you can get the hell off!”

“Are you going to cut off my hands if I don’t do as I’m told?”

Screw Coco Bandicoot. Nina walked right up to her; her breath so close it shifted the fur of Coco’s chin. “If it gets you off my ass, then I might consider it.”

“And look how that worked out for you. How much did you like petting animals?”

“Shut up.”

“Was it too nice for Cortex?”

“Shut up!”

“Admit it: he fucked you over. You’re only here because he _wanted_ you here.”

“Hogshit. I’m my own person. No one tells me what to do.”

Coco just kept going. “And you would have chosen to be evil if hadn’t stuck his nose in, would you?”

Shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up _shut up!_

“Yes!”

“Hogshit. You have no idea because you were groomed the moment you started being a goody-two shoes. You could have been nice. We could have been friends!”

“Like we could have _ever_ been friends.”

“And how do you know that?”

Other words would have been preferable. Comebacks, or a witty remark that would put Coco firmly in her place. Something as cutting as the insults Coco had been throwing at Nina over and over again. But once again, Nina only managed a sneered, “Shut up!”

“You should know more than me. This was who you were! Would you have been my friend? Were you nice? Did you want to be nice?”

“I was pathetic.”

Even Nina had to admit that was as much an admission as a simple ‘yes’ would have been. “Were you, though? Or were you just not the daughter or niece or whatever it was that Cortex wanted. He doesn’t even call you his daughter.”

“I told you, we don’t have that sort of relationship.”

“And who decided that.”

Her uncle did. Nina had grown used to the situation, taking advantage of the freedom in brought. She preferred it to the standard that society had set down for parent and child relationship. It was objectively better. It was.

Wasn’t it?

“Crunch isn’t related to me or Crash. Fuck, _none_ of us are related to each other. But I’m still their sister, and they’re still my brothers. Crunch tried to kill us, and we still love him. You have nothing like that. And if you honestly think Cortex has treated you right, then you’re never going to have anything. You’re just going to be an evil little loner for the rest of your life.”

“I don’t need anyone!”

“You deserve someone,” Coco suddenly admitted, quieter. “You think you were pathetic when you were nice but look at you now; an evil little puppet who doesn’t even realise that she’s spent her whole life doing whatever she was told.”

Coco was wrong.

Coco Bandicoot was fucking _wrong!_

“Shut.” Nina punched forward. Strike to the stomach. “Your.” Another strike, missed. “Stupid.” To the shoulder, then to the stomach again. “Bandicoot. Mouth!”

Then on instinct alone, Coco sucker punched Nina right in the face. Or so Nina assumed, at any rate.

She was out cold on the jungle floor.


	2. Maybe Not So Fudged

“Is she going to be… y’know, okay?”

Aku Aku offered Coco a warm smile. “She’s a Cortex. I have found that they are not so easily defeated. Even if you decide to punch them in the face.”

Coco knew that, somewhere at the back of her mind. She’d beaten Nina to pulp enough times to work out that much. Much like the rest Cortex’s crew, they could deal with as much as they dished out. Logic dictated that it would take a lot to seriously harm Nina.

Coco had never seen Nina so unmoving on the floor, however. Just lying there in the dirt. And despite the burning rage and pity that had driven Coco to attack Nina so viciously… she couldn’t leave her there. It felt inherently wrong, so against her moral code. Whatever that was.

After today, she supposed it might need to be reviewed slightly.

So now she was looking at Nina Cortex, laying on top of Coco’s bed. Rays of natural magic washed over the girl, healing whatever minor injuries Coco had managed to land. Aku was a kind being, above all else. He would heal Cortex himself if simply asked by a friend.

Back when Crash and Cortex were working together, he very likely did.

Which felt so wrong to say, given what she had said to Nina. In the moment, stood across from Nina and so tired, she was so sure that her argument was entirely sound. _Cortex was monster. Cortex was unloving. Cortex was cruel and merciless._

Cortex who had saved the world, for as far as that term could be stretched for someone like him. A Cortex who Coco had attacked without question when he was trying to save said world.

It was such a minor thing in the grand scheme of thing, but it went so against her argument that Coco couldn’t help but give it thought, even if just for a moment.

“Aku…” Coco began. “Was I wrong to say what I said.”

He didn’t know everything; Coco honestly hadn’t the energy to repeat their entire argument. Nor did she particularly want to, not to someone she revered so highly. But he had the basics, and sometimes that was all the old mask needed to make a sound decision.

“It isn’t like you to have reservations about fighting with Nina.”

Even if he often delayed getting to that point in lieu of teaching a lesson.

“I usually don’t call her a bitch.”

“True,” he chuckled. “What makes you doubt yourself?”

“I don’t know, really. I just… I feel bad for her. I just cut her down and kept going. And I don’t know if she’s even the one I should be screaming at. Everything I hit her for, Cortex is the cause.”

“Yet, we do not have the full story. Every tale has two side. Three. Four. A dozen, a hundred. As a reader we cannot know all the information, with only one page of one book presented to us at a time. And it is wrong to assume we do.”

“Yeah…” Coco quietly agreed.

“Even I do not know the full story of Nina Cortex,” he admitted. “If I did wish to know, however…” Nina began to stir. Grunts of pain or discomfort climbing out past her black lipstick. “I would perhaps begin by reading from her book.”

Aku smiled at Coco one final time, vanishing in a thin mist of air and magic with only a natural warmth in his wake. The waves that had bathed Nina vanished with him, her eyes flickering only moments after.

“… Right,” Coco replied, to no one.

*******

Nina opened her eyes, the world a groggy messy of shifting shapes and far too much light. What should have been the midst of the jungle felt stale and muted. The air was stuffy. It was the air of somewhere that was very much inside a building. The thought was enough to bring Nina out of whatever dazed stupor she was in.

Eyes wide, one thing was immediately clear. She wasn’t in the jungle. She wasn’t at the site of her new lab.

… Why wasn’t she in the jungle? Why didn’t she know where she was?

Why was she somewhere soft?

“Hi,” came a quiet voice. One she recognised all too well. Coco Bandicoot. “Just… stay down, okay? I punched you pretty hard in the face.”

“Of course, you did,” Nina huffed. She promptly ignored Coco’s sage advice and got to her feet anyway, slapping away a hand that tried to convince her otherwise. “Don’t touch me.”

But her head felt heavy, her balance skewed. The moment she pushed herself off the bed, onto her feet was the same moment that she found herself faltering, her head very much attracted to the floor. Once again, a hand came to help her. As much as she tried, Nina couldn’t slap it away quickly enough.

“I said stay down. What part of that didn’t you understand?”

“Forgive me if I don’t feel like listening to you, Bandicoot. Maybe I’m too much of a _bitch_ to care about what you have to say.”

Oh. Right. That was why–

The argument came back to the forefront of her mind, then. Simple insults followed closely by deep cuts and very personal, very deep cut that just seemed to keep going. Nina wanted to think that she gave as good as she got. Very few situations came to mind where she hadn’t.

But even she had to admit that today had been one of those times.

Why hadn’t Nina shot back?

Why couldn’t she?

“Nina?”

Probably because she _was_ pathetic.

_“You think you were pathetic when you were nice but look at you now…”_

If much more came after, it was a hazy mess of light and a fist colliding with her nose. But she did remember what Coco had said.

_“An evil little puppet who doesn’t even realise that she’s spent her whole life doing whatever she was told…”_

Nina had been pathetic when she was nice: she had thrown tea parties for toys and spent hours with the animals captured by her uncle for his experiments. She spent time with the rabbits and the squirrels and the skunks. She threw tea parties for them and she did it without even a shred of irony. She had _liked_ tea parties. She had _liked_ playing with the animals. She had _liked that she did those things_ and had tried to be friends with the monsters that Neo had created.

She had been nice. She had been _too_ nice. Even now, looking back with a reflective mind, she could see that. She wasn’t fit to be a scientist, evil or not. She didn’t fit with the world that she lived in. She wouldn’t be in the world that she was if she hadn’t been changed by her uncle. He had set down the foundations for the path she had taken.

But was that any better than being groomed into that same lifestyle? Was it the same?

Nina didn’t know. She wasn’t sure she wanted to know. How _would_ she have turned out if left to her devices? Would she have still discovered her knack for mechanical engineering and evil science? Would she have still been immensely intelligent? Would she have held as much in her mechanicals hands as she did right now?

… Would she even have mechanical hands?

Nina liked her hands, didn’t she? She didn’t care that they weren’t organic. She owned her status as an amputee. Nina wouldn’t have traded them for real hands if the offer had been there; they were an objective improvement.

How had she felt when they were first cut off? Had she been scared? Upset?

Had she hated her uncle? Had she forgotten? Was she finally happy to be fitting in with those around her?

Had she been brainwashed?

Had she blocked the memories out? If she had, why did she remember crushing little animals by accident? Why had she kept those memories, and not those from the event itself?

What was she doing?

Who even was she? Was she even her own person?

“Nina.”

She had simply thought herself normal; any child that went to school learned the world worked a certain way. So what if her side of things didn’t work under the same rules as Coco expected; it was normal to her. It was normal to all the other evil students at the academy.

When a ‘good’ child was ‘bad’, you punished them. The same was the case when an ‘evil’ child was ‘good’. You made sure they didn’t make the same mistakes again. Nina certainly thought locking an evil genius in prison for decades at a time was a monstrous waste of money, time and resources. That was _intelligence_ wasted, sat rotting in a cell and being of no use to anyone, evil or otherwise.

“Nina–” Fuck off.

“ _What?_ What do you want, Bandicoot?”

“You’re crying.”

Nina Cortex didn’t cry. “No, I’m not.”

“Yes, you are,” Coco stated, her voice firm.

Evidence suggested that Coco was telling the truth. The skin beneath Nina’s eyes stung, and the growing urge to sniffle hard pawed at the back of her nose. She couldn’t even swallow. The rising lump in her throat saw to that.

“Congratulations, then,” Nina spat. “You win. Happy?”

Coco wasn’t sure that she was. In fact, the bandicoot very much doubted it. “No, of course I’m not _happy_. I don’t like being mean.”

“Shame. You did quite well.”

“That’s not the point. I just…”

Coco didn’t finish. Nina thought it guilt, or some other moral string holding Coco together. Maybe it was pity. Nina assumed that would be the end of whatever conversation the bandicoot was trying to force.

Coco pulled Nina into a hug instead.

“Wha–”

Nina could have pulled away, if she wanted. She did want to, she told herself. But her head was light, and her muscle lethargic. She was still weak from her sucker punch to the face.

That was definitely it.

It wasn’t the feeling of warm fur against her cheek, or the bubbles of isolated memory it brought to the forefront of her mind. Of days sat at small tables with a baby blue kangaroo and a sleepy koala. Before things changed.

“What are you doing?” Nina asked.

“I’m…” Coco began. “I’m sorry. Okay?”

“Pfft, yeah. Sure you are.”

“No, I am! I don’t… _do_ what I did.”

“I’ve tried to kill you.”

“And I’ve tried to kill you. Doesn’t mean I can’t be nice to you.”

Nina scoffed into Coco’s shoulder. “Yeah, because that makes total sense.”

“I’m sorry I was so harsh. I didn’t mean it.”

“Yeah, you did,” Nina growled. Still, she didn’t pull out of the hug. A minute more, when her strength was back, she would then. Definitely. “You’ve been waiting to cut me down for years.”

Coco didn’t want to admit that was true, even if she knew there was something in there. Of course, she imagined the things she wanted to do to her enemies, in the heat of the moment. Things she wanted to say to their face as they looked at her with awe and fear, things she would do if she ever had the chance.

But most days, they faded away. It wasn’t worth the energy to get so angry, or cruel. Nor did it sit well in her stomach. “I was having a bad day.”

“Heh.” Nina gave in, sniffing the sadness back up her nose. “You didn’t deny it.”

“No… but wanting to do something and actually doing it are different things.” All those other thoughts though, the ones she spoke with Aku about came back. The doubts and the uncertainties. And the advice he gave in response. “I… H-How are you?”

Nina response was immediate. “I don’t think you care.”

“Well, I do. So tough fudge.” She squeezed tighter. Nina fought against it, this time. “Answer my question.”

“No. You shit on my entire life and everything I stand for.” Nina would have spat, if she had the energy. “Fuck you.”

“Okay.” Coco couldn’t deny Nina her rebuttal, even if it stung. “So, you’re not okay.”

“So smart.”

Nina could feel the tears, now. Trails of something she tried to ignore rolling down her cheeks, trailing freely from her eyes. It was an unusual sensation, and not one she wanted to grow used to. It was a pressure, slowly leaking from her body. It made her lighter. Lighter in a way that didn’t send bring her head closer to the floor.

The tears didn’t fall far. They only got so far before the drops seeped into Coco’s fur. Nina hated that most of all.

“You think you know everything, Bandicoot. You think you’re smarter than me? I know he cut my hands off. I know he sent me to Madame Amberly’s. Do you think I care?”

“I think you do.”

“… Not anymore, I don’t,” Nina admitted. “I like who I am. I _like_ being evil. I _like_ betraying my uncle. So what if he put me where I am. I decide what happens now.”

“Okay…”

Something familiar came back to Nina. Something that made her want to fight back, to be snarky. “Is that all you have to say? After shitting on me? ‘Okay’?”

“I don’t know how to deal with evil people being upset!”

“Makes two of us.”

Coco thought for a moment. “I-I… don’t know what to do, or if I can help. But if you want to talk about… stuff?”

“You’ll be there for me, will you?”

“Yeah.”

Nina thought for a moment of her own. The outcome was pointlessly obvious. “You know how stupid that sounds, right?”

“You’re letting me hug you.”

Nina knew exactly how stupid _that_ sounded. She decided to change that.

Pushing Coco away, the strength in her hands not allowing for much resistance, Nina got to her feet. Her stance was airy, not quite up to her usual standard. It was solid or resolute. But it would do, for now.

“That was a stupid idea, too,” Nina added, dusting herself down for no real reason at all. “I don’t need your help. I don’t need my uncle’s help. When my labs set up, I won’t need anyone.”

Nina made for the only door in the room, not caring to look at the decorations around it. Her hands gripped tightly at the handle, warping the metal as she pulled it open.

“If you ever _want_ help though, I, uh… don’t mind.” Coco tried her best to sounds hopeful, though she wasn’t sure why. “Okay?”

The door paused; Nina’s hand still gripped at the handle. The metal warped further, losing the homemade hoop it had been to become something less refined. Some broken shape without a name.

But it still worked. It could still do what it had to do.

“…Yeah, whatever.” Nina eventually mumbled, before adding, “thanks,” deep under her breath. So deep, that she hoped Coco wouldn’t hear.

Nina made her way out of the room, letting the door fall shut behind. Nina was gone.

Coco did hear. And despite her reservations, she smiled.


End file.
